Your dad ate local, fair-trade, organic produce before you did and he’s still got the cultivation skills to prove it. With a leather tanned neck and a green thumb, he seduced Mother Earth into growing him the best vegetables anyone has ever seen. But, he wasn’t a gardener. Gardeners are old ladies with sun hats and bad knees. He was the John Wayne of farming that had a quiet confidence he could grow anything. He didn’t need even need pesticides because he was intimidating enough to keep pests away from his food babies.
So hipsters, when you’re sitting in a restaurant you found on yelp and you’re pestering the waitress to see if the tomatoes in your salad are fair-trade, locally grown, organic and sustainably farmed, remember this…
Your dad wasn’t into eating local, fair-trade, organic so that he could smugly look down upon everyone else who doesn’t. He ate that way because it just taste damn better and all he cared about was enjoying the best things in life.
My family publicist skillz cannot be stopped.